For many people in the LGBTQ+ community, an important part of fully expressing your identity is “coming out,” whether that means sharing who you are publicly, or with only a few close friends or family members, or simply making an acknowledgment to yourself.
Coming out can feel daunting — either from fear of others’ reactions or the feeling that your life will change irrevocably after that point. (Though it’s important to note that many of those changes can be positive ones, such as finding meaningful community and representation.) No matter how you step into your identity, the end goal is hopefully the same: to let breathe a part of yourself that is important and valuable. Here, we’ve gathered quotes about coming out to bolster you if you’re considering taking that momentous step, or to support you if it still feels intimidating. As actor and playwright Harvey Fierstein has said, “Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself."
Don’t come out unless you want to. Don’t come out for anyone else’s sake. Don’t come out because you think society expects you to. Come out for yourself. Come out to yourself. Shout, sing it. Softly stutter.Dean Atta, author
If you possess enough courage to speak out what you are, you will find you are not alone.Richard Wright, author
Freedom isn't just about voting and marrying and kissing on the street, although all of these things are important. Freedom is also about what you will allow yourself to do.David Levithan, author
The only difference is that we love differently and we express ourselves differently. Rather than being chastised for that we should be commended for being brave. That’s the most important thing: giving people the space to show up fully as who they are.Cynthia Erivo, actor and singer
Only by speaking out can we create lasting change. And that change begins with coming out.DaShanne Stokes, sociologist
If people are not able to come out to friends and family, come out to yourself, disclose to yourself, and tell the truth first to yourself because that’s the most important thing.Laverne Cox, actor and activist
The world is still so mind-bogglingly oppressive for so many in our community that it remains radical to be joyful.Naomi McPherson, musician
Before I came out as trans, I was always hiding parts of myself, so I blended in more to the people around me. Once I came out, I didn’t really have to “blend in” anymore.carpetgarden, musician
Getting comfortable with your sexuality is a process… Take it slow. It can define you as much as you want it to.Shannon Purser, actor
By coming out to ourselves, we free up the energy we spent keeping a part of ourselves hidden.Patrick Califia, author
There is only one of you in the world and you have one life, so be the best version of yourself and be proud of who you are. That’s when you attract the right people around you to make you better, and ultimately, happier.Mel Reid, golfer
[Coming out] was so important to me because it’s a big part of an internal struggle of mine, and I’m obviously proud of it, but at the same time there was this really deep feeling of shame. I just wanted to… be real with myself.Rina Sawayama, musician
When we choose to live authentically we chip away at others’ prisons of pretend and create an opportunity for them to walk out of darkness into freedom.Anthony Venn-Brown, author
Photo credit: Roland Magnusson/ iStock
